2 1/2 Month Blog Vacation and Wacky Ads

I just got an email from a friend who asked me if I thought things are getting ramped up in life. The answer is: YES!!!!! It's not like I signed up for a million things this summer, we were just busy having fun and making sure the boredom stayed away, particularly in August. We really did have a great summer and I will post pictures about them. But this post is going to be about two ads. I'm raring to go after 2 1/2 months:

There is a billboard on the way from Davis County to Salt Lake. It is a black and white picture of Jennifer Aniston. She is somewhat covered in a bedsheet and holding something up in her hand. What do you think that product is? Perfume? Fabric Softner? Cotton? Air freshner? Wrong. THE AD IS FOR "SMART WATER"!!!

To make the ad even more unbelievable, the ad says "My Secret Revealed." Does this strike anyone else as a little off-the-mark? What this says to me is: Jennifer Anniston drinks Smart Water, which makes her so smart she advertises bottled water in something that must make total sense to her: sheets. I'm thinking the ad executive needs to dip into some of that Smart Water. Which, by the way, makes you no smarter than regular water. In fact, buying the stuff actually makes a good case for a low I.Q. because if you think that fortified water will make you smarter you may as well lay around in sheets all day.

Here's another great ad that comes to my mailbox every three months or so. It says:

"Life is too short to clean your own house." It is an ad for a maid service. So, does this mean that for the maids advertised, life is long? If so, should I look into maid service as my own employment? Forget finding the fountain of youth, I'll just clean other people's houses and I'll live long. So, why can't I clean my own house and live long? Maybe it's because I know the people that belong to the socks I pick up every day and with each sock a gray hair emerges because I know I've told them a gazillion time to pick them up, but I end up doing it!!! Then I wonder how I'm going to pay for the things that are more fun than cleaning my house when I'm paying for a maid to clean it. I suppose the maid service is banking on the chance that the person who cleans house picks up the flier and exclaims, "you know, you're right! life is too short to clean my house! I've wasted my life away! Well, that's going to change here and now." Then six months down the road after paying the maid bills and deciding it wasn't worth it, this person still thinks life is too short to clean the house and then we get reality shows about hoarders.

I'll actually posts interesting pictures next time.

A Few Pictures From a Few Trips-Four Months Later

We took a few vacations this summer. Most were to parks and natural places. We've decided that we will try to visit as many national and state parks as we can. Granna gave us PBS documentary on National Parks that I have been watching while I exercise and one of the commentators said something to the effect of: Nature has a way of humbling you because it reminds you that you are not the biggest thing in the world. Amen to that! We could all do with some humbling. Well, I could.

We went to Colorado this year to visit the Ames', David and Lieve, and Jesse. With David and Lieve we went to Rocky Mountain National Park. We hiked to many lakes which were so beautiful! James decided he would be our GPS and took the front of the hiking line and D.J. was right behind him as a self-proclaimed "navigator." Both jobs helped them get up the mountain without too much murmuring.

A great hiking help was age appropriate booklets given by the Forest Rangers that the boys completed along the way, identifying flowers, animals, erosion and other natural occurrences. At the completion of the booklets an official Park Ranger gave them their own badges and they recited a pledge to care for nature as official Jr. Park Rangers.

One of the beautiful lakes with lily pads behind us. D.J., of course, stepped into the muddy banks and had to walk with gushy sandals for a while.

Denver has a great Science Museum that we visited with the Ames' family and David and Lieve. Favorite activities were trying to find the garden gnomes painted into the scenery (only found one after help from an employee), making our own sand craters, dancing in heat sensitive cameras and finding our house with a spinning table and satellite GPS thingy.

The Michael and Libby found an awesome baby sitter to watch all six kids while we went to Cheddars for dinner! Anna, Spencer, Eli, James, Peter and D.J.

We went to the perfect size water park for keeping track of kids. We had a great time with big slides and little slides and splash pads everywhere!

At the beginning of the summer in June, we went to Marysvale, UT a small mining town, with the Wheelers and stayed in an Old Town hotel-ish/cabin-ish place. We had great fun riding four-wheelers (discovering that you can pull start a four-wheeler after Mark and I towed one back- we are such city people), playing horseshoes, mother may I, blasting air rockets, talking around the fire in the rain and just letting the cousins play. It was very cold and wet, but very, very fun!!!

Happy Anniversary To Me!

25 years ago today (4th of July) I was diagnosed with Type I diabetes. 25 years! For all the hubbub and caution and scare tactics that we were introduced to when I was diagnosed, I thought I wouldn't live past 20! And here I am, 25 years later, with three kids, a wonderful husband, an active lifestyle and relatively good health. Here's why:

I have a Father in Heaven who listens to all my pleadings for help with self-control, patience and perspective, and then He actually helps me! He has blessed me with a body that bounces back fairly quickly from low and high blood sugar. A body that gives me warnings about low and high blood sugar. And has blessed me with a Savior that offers hope and help while dealing with all my issues, as well as hope for a perfect body someday.

I have incredibly wonderful parents who raised me to be strong and independent (if I do say so myself) but reliant on the Lord. They both taught me to work hard and not give up, how to set and achieve goals, and how to work through mistakes. They have spent countless hours in worry and prayer and care and hope for a normal life. I have great brothers and a sister who have always had concern for me, which has given me strength. I love you!

I live in an age where scientists, doctors, nurses, technicians, engineers, computer techs and all others associated with them, have invented exogenous insulin, blood sugar monitors, insulin pumps, glucose tablets, glucagon, A1C tests, test strips, shot needles, lancets and much, much more. It's unlikely that those mentioned above read my blog, but if you know someone in those categories, please, please, please tell them that I thank God for them often in my prayers. Without these things I could not have had the healthy babies I did or enjoy life as I do.

I have a sensitive, caring and charitable husband who holds me close when my blood sugar is low, when I feel so insecure and shaky. He listens to me during bouts of frustration when I'm having unexplainable ups and downs with blood sugar levels. He reminds me that my health is top priority and no product is too expensive if it will help me have better control. That he wanted to marry me despite me having the sixth leading cause of death in the nation is a continual amazement to me. Thank you for improving my life, for being brave and following the Spirit! I love you!

I have three amazing boys whose existence reminds me everyday that my life is not just for me. The control I have of my blood sugar determines how long I get to spend with them and all others I love. No matter how much I want the freedom to eat whatever and whenever I want without having to check my blood sugar level multiple times a day to monitor the effects, that desire is dwarfed by the desire to live longer. I have ups and downs and times when I lack self-control, but they bring me back.

I am so blessed! I'm happy to have made it 25 years with all the help I've been given. Here's to AT LEAST 25 more!

Product Names and the Laundry Room Garbage

I bought a pair of pantyhose yesterday. I don't know what I was thinking. Wait, I do. My legs are not lovely suntan legs. They are white and freckly. Who made pantyhose anyway? Probably the same MAN that invented high heeled shoes.

The hose are a brand that has been around for a while, but the name struck me as funny: "No Nonsense." What does that mean? No nonsense when it comes to making your legs look tannish? No nonsense trying to make your tummy flatter? No nonsense because wearing panty hose is sensical? No nonsense because I make sure to use the bathroom before church so I don't have to go while I'm there and try to get those darn pantyhose up again without grunting in the women's bathroom? Really.

While I'm on the subject of weird product names, ponder on these names of deodrant:

Suave (bad cover-up), Secret (everyone does it), Ban (if only), Sure (of what exactly?), Dry Idea (but it's only an idea?), Lady Speed Stick (has nothing to do with b.o., could be a baseball bat for all we know), Degree (is there a certain degree at which you start perspiring and why don't they tell us), and one called Kiss My Face (because direction away from the armpit is needed).

Now, let's talk about happy meal toys. I cannot figure out why these toy makers think they are scoring points with parents when they include KAZOOS in their happy meals!!!! Or toys that repeat the same sound over and over and over and over again. Stupid Shrek Pinocchio character: "I'll never be a real boy!" Toymakers need to consider that these meals are often purchased while on road trips. I refuse to take that kind of punishment and despite my passion for recycling anything, I will just toss these toys into the garbage with no remorse whatsoever.

I can't figure out if the latest toy from a happy meal is good or bad or just plain worthless. CD's with music and dancing instructions from "So, You Think You Can Dance." My mind goes blank. That must mean it's worthless. I can't even think of a wise crack about it because it's just plain dumb. These CDs will be a great addition to the CDs I have hanging in my garden to scare off the birds. Yes, I'm psycho and that will be the subject of a different post. Then there was the microphone that came with the American Idol Happy Meal and the small radio that played the same snippet of the same annoying song. That was a year ago - and I still remember the tune.

It's a good thing my kids never check the laundry room garbage can.

Best happy meal toy award goes to Wendy's. A year ago they put Magic Treehouse books on CD's in the meals. Two thumbs up from me!

I Couldn't Have Known. . .

Before marriage, a women tends to wonder if the man she is dating will be a good husband and father. The only thing she has to base this on is her experience with her father and other male influences. There are all sorts of ambiguous qualifications for a future husband and father of her children: must have sense of humor, must be kind, must communicate well, must like children, must like Star Wars, etc., etc. I don't know how many lists like this I made with girlfriends in high school and college ranging from extremely specific to roll-your-eyes silly. I suppose it's OK to be ambiguous because there's at least a little direction, plus there really is no other option because how can a woman really know what bringing a new baby into the world will do to her and her husband until it happens. For instance:

I couldn't have known. . . how wonderfully involved Mark would be in taking care of basic baby needs: changing diapers, feeding, rocking to sleep, cleaning up throw up, sucking snot out with the blue bobble of death, bathing.

I couldn't have known . . . the powerful feelings that come when I watch Mark teaching our boys correct principles and morals.

I couldn't have known. . . that Mark would not talk down to the boys, but maintain the same vocabulary with them that he does with his clients (though maybe a little less about C-corps and S-corps).

I couldn't have known . . . the utter joy of a whole family laughing together - even over bodily functions!

I couldn't have known . . . how passionately Mark feels about providing the necessities for his family, but not overindulging.

I couldn't have known. . . how much of his happiness comes from opening the door after coming home from work to boys ready to be with him.

I couldn't have known. . . the look on Mark's face when one of our sons touches his heart in some way or another.

There are so many other wonderful things I've discovered about Mark while parenting with him!

I realize of course that there is a flip side to this and that there are a lot of things that we couldn't have known that lead to spouse and parental hardship and we are not immune to these. But the hardships are tempered with the wonderful surprises which makes us fulfilled. I am not saying that I have the best husband in all the world, who is the best father in all the world (there is only One of those). But, he is the best for me and the best for our children and I don't compare him to others, because you have the best for you (hopefully).

Thanks for being the best Dad for our three boys, Mark!

Dinner Converstaion

We were invited over to our neighbor's home for dinner tonight. What a lovely thing. I love having good conversation over food. She prepared a delicious meal and dessert. Over dessert, D.J. decides to contribute to the conversation. Let it be noted that we were having brownies.

"When James was little he had diarrhea and pooped all over the bathroom floor."

End of conversation. All conversation.

They laughed. Whew!

We had to explain to them that the kids were asking us about funny stories when they were little. We would tell them one and they would ask for more. We were getting desperate for funny stories, so we started in on the throw up and poop stories. They are funny now. Not then. I guess D.J. wanted to make everyone laugh. He did.

When it Comes to Literacy, I Lose All Dignity

Here is the real reason I closed off my blog to the general public: I am a wacko and I'm only comfortable with people who already know just how wacko I am viewing these pictures. Not really. I love to make anyone smile. As I posted on my Facebook page last week, I lose all sense of dignity when I read to children and when I can make adults crack a smile and lose a little dignity, that's even better. So I hope this makes you smile!

Every month at our elementary school I read to every class in the school. I select a theme and read books on that theme according to grade level. I usually dress up as someone from a lower grade book, because they think it's really great. The older kids think I'm a little wacko, but they get excited to see me every month because I do voices. A lot of the kids check out books that I've read, so I consider my mission accomplished!

Mystery month: Nate the Great

Nature month: The Tiny Seed

History month: Betsy Ross (reading "So, You Want to be President?)

Series month: If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. . .

Giving month: The Giving Tree

Thankful I can read month: Amelia Bedelia

Books make me curious: Curious George

I'm ready for vacation month: Click, Clack Moo, Cows That Type

The good news is I get to do it next year too!